Today's been a better day.
This last week, it's been tough as I've finally started feeling the mood swings that mass quantities of hormones promise to bring. Considering I have only have 10 weeks to go, a few mood swings are a minor complaint...but still, it's not fun. I literally ran out of patience last Friday. I had to tell a kid who asked me if he could do CORRECTIONS during homeroom to go back to his seat and essentially leave me alone. Now, had he irked me 5 different directions previously that day? Yes. I didn't blow up and scream at him or anything, but when you don't have enough patience to hand a kid a test so he can do extra work, the well has run dry. Or when you find yourself in tears at Jason's Deli because a friend took your seat, all is not well.
It's like being a bomb of potential testiness ready to go off. Cake helps, of course, but the Dr. told me that I have to really watch my weight because I gained too much over Christmas, and if I'm not careful, I'll end up gaining 50lbs. And I've had to by all new clothes because no item of pre-pregnancy clothing I own fits, so I know she's right. That is insanely bothersome, compounding the moodiness. I feel upset so I want a cookie, but then I remember I shouldn't eat cookies...so then I'm upset and deprived. Then I eat two cookies. Then I feel guilty and fat and even more upset. Vicious cycle.
But today has been better. Students were better today. Engaged, interested, learning. They even had fun and made me laugh, including my terribly unmotivated 4th period. I taught them some creole and they performed dialogues for the class. It was fun. And now, I have a nice warm dog on each side of me on the couch. They're sweet and fluffy. I love them. They don't mind the moods.
And Casey is wonderful, much better than a cookie. He makes me feel happy again even when my mood is really black...the "I hate everyone and everything" feeling. I'm so thankful to be married to such a sweet, funny, caring man. I couldn't do this without him.