Sunday, May 11, 2008

WARNING: Superficial & (maybe) Braggy

So, Casey and I just went to the mall to bring my mom her Mother's Day present at work (she works in the sleepwear department at Dillards). Well, after that we walked a loop around Northpark. It's a pretty place, and sorta a place to see and be seen, but some of the stuff they sell there is ridiculous both in fashion and in price. I distinctly remember looking at a manikin and thinking, "That must be a size two. No one's a size two. Why do they model a size that no one wears?" Nothing against stick-people, but I thought that because most of my life I've worn a size 12 or so, and so that's how I think of myself.

Casey wants so new shorts, so we went in the GAP. Out of curiosity, I tried on a pair of pants a size smaller than the size of my newest shorts, which is the smallest size I've ever worn, a 4. So, I try on the size 2 pants, and they fit. Fit, and better than the shorts I own. So I try on a couple other pairs that size to confirm. They all fit. I do I little dance in the dressing room like Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction.

Then out of pure reckless curiosity, I grab a pair even smaller, the mythic and unachievable 0. I mean...0 makes no sense...if it's 0, then it's nothing...how can someone wear it? And though it's not my style..it fits. I can sit down, move, etc. How is this possible? That is for stick-figure people. I have big quads and a butt that sticks out disproportionately to the rest of my body. And I would never wear it because it's tighter than I would wear my clothes...but just the idea makes my mind spin...if this is 0, what does Sarah Jessica Parker wear? Is there a -8?

So, in celebration, I bought both a cookie and a brownie at Mrs. Fields. But...to be honest...I haven't eaten them yet. Maybe I am a stick-person. How disgusting.

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